I've often visited another person's blog and been confused. They refer to an illness or struggle and I have no idea what they're talking about. I understand a blog is kind of a history. And coming in on the middle means I will miss things and some things won't make sense.
But I wanted to make it simpler on my blog. I just thought it would help if you know what I'm talking about when I refer to not being well.
chronic, recurrent depression
PTSD -- from various abusive situations
PMDD -- high end PMS (up to two weeks a months, sometimes debilitating)
carpal tunnel in both arms
Undiagnosed (after many tests and treatments including MRIs, neurological screenings, electro-conductivity testing, many blood tests, eyes checked, teeth checked, psychological screening, EKG, pain clinic workup, sleep study):
chronic headache (since 2005)
chronic fatigue (since 2001)
various symptoms that may or may not be related to the above: fluctuating vision, dizziness, nausea
Basically, I am exhausted all of the time. No matter how I eat or sleep. And I hurt all day, every day. No matter what pain meds I take. Therefore, my life is different from what I expected it to be. I have had to learn to redefine what is important and why I am of value.
And other than taking thyroid medication, medication for dizziness, and an occasional therapy session, I am no longer seeking treatment for any of these issues. They are not life-threatening and I will not spend the rest of my life being a patient when I don't have to. The roller coaster of diagnosis and treatment is just too much. I am finding joy and value in the life I have. For now.